Non-stop

I am so so tired now. I cannot sleep now because i have to finish the HSBC YEA business plan. I have to persevere. I have to finish it. For time that being wasted for onlining and chatting, i need to rush now. Shoulder pain and finger kena cut just now. Ish. where kena also don't know. Stress nya. Midterms on tuesday, Friday and Saturday. And alot of assignment need to be hand in the following week and midterms again. non-stop. non-stop. Suddenly like to type a lot of words on the key board. Non-stop non-stop. Feeling so good. Seriously my typing skills improved a lot since i studied in UTAR. Thanks to assignments and assignements and reports and proposals and minutes and minutes and porposals and reports......never ends.... non-stop!!

It's 5am in the morning, I still have a lot to complete. I need a shoulder to rest on. a pillow also can. i miss my bed. Thanks CC, calling up at the right moment again. TIRED!! And my light in my room, ish, not functioning already. Called to the management and she said Monday only can come and fix it. ISH!! I don't want mosquitoes.

It's nearly break of dawn. Perhaps i don't need to sleep and staright away go see sunrise and had a breakfast. By the way, Kampar here just cannot see SUNRISE. Blocked by the "mountain". And i had twice mamak yesterday. It's not munasabah. Cannot. No more mamak this week.

Non-stop comes to an end. Gonna rush my business plan. HOpefuly it's presenatable enough although it is done only in less than 24 hours. hahaha!! wish me luck..

Cherish the moment

Today did something rebellious but meaningful i think. I decided to visit my ex's family. I actually wished to visit them long time ago. Miss them alot. And i didn't inform him and just contacted his sis. haha. and i didn't tell my mum about this. So consider, rebellious. Feeling of driving alone to his house is really different with last time he drove me there. I somehow scared myself will got lost somewhere on the way. Luckilly, safely reached. His sister, ah po and his mum were there. Feeling of familiarity comforted my heart. Warm hospitality touched my heart. It's heartfelt.

My ex was there when i reached and we just had a single conversation. The situation was quite embarrasing. Luckilly his sister chat with me eased up the surroundings. And he went upstairs. And he went out when i was playing, erm, just kind of staring their new born puppies. They are damn cute!! And i took this photo from his wall photos. Tada~~

It's a girl!!

When i thought of wanna got off, his mum asked me to stay and have late lunch with her and ah po. touching. Curry chicken and Assam prawn, so familiar. And when auntie ask me about things related to our relationship, my tears dropped. beh tahan. And to my surprise, auntie gave me tissues. It was so touching. Auntie said she sokong me. haha. It's heartfelt. Even when my mum asked me about this, i also don't dare to cry. Caring and love from his family members dissolved me. They asked me don't think so much and work hard in studies. *hugs* We are still friends. I still remember during a dinner, auntie said:" we talked about heart, not materiality". It's so true and unforgettable. We chat for awhile, and i helped his sis to prepare chinese style pudding called "yan cai gao". It was fun! haha. And i got to go once finished. It's quite late already.

On the way back to Kampar, I cried. Reminiscing the old times with his family, joyful, fun and happiness. Memories tend to fade away, but, some memories will just stay. thanks for everything. I cherish it very much.

Today is the 8th day of CNY and hokkien people will have this celebration of Bai Tian Gong. how i wish i can join one of the ceremony and experience the lively atmosphere. Back to Kampar, alone in the hostel. Thanks Chee Choon, calling up at the right moment and i could hear the sound of firecrackers at the other side in Penang. bustling moment. nice.

Let me end my blog today by a pantun that i thought of it randomly, it's not nice.

Nyamuk di Kampar semuanya ganas,

Gatal sangat bila terkena.

Cuaca Kampar jugapun panas,

Kesian pelajar kalian tidur tak lena.

p/s: Paktor is not about 2 persons that be together, it's about 2 families.

你们的心意我收到了,在心中. 谢谢你们.

Seriously grateful

Had headache the whole day followed by eyes pain. I deserved this as i slept damn "early" everyday. Thanks to Ngar, Mei qi, Raymond, Seng Poh, Ah beng, Shu, Xiao bai, lok thim, heok theng, Kong, Ivan and roslyn. Thanks for talking to me or attempt to talk to me when i need somebody to talk to. And i realized i am not out of the group, it should be i always not in the group. haha. I care about this so much, and it disturbed me for the whole day.

Told myself don't care about it anymore, because, you are not alone. You are not perfect. You cannot satisfy everyone around you. You cannot make everyone happy to see you. You are homo sapien. You have emotions. You have your own way of thinking. You have your own likes and dislikes. You have your own opinion. You have your own perception. You have your unique personality. You are different. Everyone is different. You just CAN'T SATISFY everyone around you.

Damn. Man U just lost to Everton. And it was a tough game. Everton played very well. Everton deserved the 3 points.

I am going back to Kampar tomorrow. It's saddening. I have to go back to the reality. Full of assignments and midterm test. Aiks. I wanna tune back my biological clock, to a normal one. I am looking forward to a few things:

1. 25 Feb, Photography Society General Meeting

2. 26 Feb, a talk by a special one

3. 28 Feb, Carling Cup Final!! Man U vs Aston Villa. A must watch!

4. 3rd March, UTAR Model Search 2010 Finale (I hope i can enter as a photographer)

5. The day finished midterms and assignment

6. The day CC coming back to Kampar

Must remind myself, ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL.

4th day of CNY~~

Tada!!

Feels super happy today!!

I bought this newest book of Sophie which i wanted it so much once it published since last year!!

above are my another try in photoshop. nice?

it's yng xing birthday!!

Tomorrow plan to go jogging, hope i can wake up in the morning. Nitez.

p/s: i think i cannot wake up in the morning because of uploading all the photos for my classmates. zzz...

发现

突然发现，享受有你存在的日子

突然发现， 享受与你相处的日子

Helped them to take this photo randomly because saw them in the same restaurant.

*My photography addiction attacked* and I was holding my camera.

Above is my first attempt in photoshop

*purple color distracting and made the hands look green- by shu*

Because i have forgotten the curves and channel mixer adjustment

this is my 2nd attempt!! hope it's ok.

This is before

* with my beloved T5 classmates in Dong Hai*

This is after

*What do u think?*

*p/s : photos are nothing to do with my statement on top

Reality?

What is so fantastic about the reality? Can i just don't want to face the reality? It's disgusting. Can i find a place like Pandora, and stay there, just don't think about anything? I just wanna crap something here to release stress. I am strong enough to face the reality. I just feel bad sometimes. Always be a yes girl. Always try to challenge myself. I am just trying to change this kind of shit attitude. duhhh...

Since i am just the only girl in my family, with 2 little brothers, I must have been always acting as a big sister. Parents trained me to be strong, be tough. Not only to excel in studies, but to excel in other things. Thanks to them, i became strong and persevering in my responsibility. It's not that i am complaining or what, but, just that i need a shoulder sometimes, to rest on. Maybe I am not in my hometown and parents are not around with me, I miss you all, dad and mum.

The reality is cruel. Lots of people around you is wearing a mask, telling you something that is not sincere, doing things that hurt and harm you. In order to protect ourselves from all these, we have to be like them, right? But, honestly, I wouldn't be one of these kinda persons. I believe that if we treat them nicely and heartfelt, they will feel it, and they will change. I strongly believe it. God knows. On the other hand, there are kind people in this world, somewhere around the world where you maybe meet them or not, agree? Just appreciate everyone in your life, no matter they are bad or good, for sure you learn something from them. Grateful and peace.

And I know that I must work hard in this year of Tiger, treat everyone better and better, and of course not forget myself. I just wish that my dearly family, dearly friends, dearly mates and dearly dearly to be as fit as a fiddle and in the pink of health always, happy everyday. Besides, may the year of Tiger, will bring peace for the world, bring hope for people who despair, bring luck to people who wish. Stop the war, stop pollution, stop everything and go green!! I am sure you can do it.

Last but not least (macam sedang beri ceramah aje), Wish everyone Happy Chinese New Year and also Selamat Hari Kekasih!!

Sekian, terima kasih.

Divergence and intergration

There's been so many things happen lately. Somebody is trying to play politics here ever since the somebody was brought in. Divergence is happening. It's not the way you should do things. It's wrong. Society interest is to my fullest concern. If you had self- interest and were to create chaos and confusion, i will therefore, with my shield and sword, protect the one or the thing that i need to. I respect you, with the position you are holding, and i, respect myself as well, doing the thing that falls within my job scope. Please don't ever mess things up, do not ever try to challenge the constitutions of society. You still do not know the regulations implied. You are just doing things that you describe as "best" for the society's interest. It's not.

Integration is define as the organization of the constituent elements of the personality into a coordinated, harmonious whole. Somehow, people just do not know the importance of adopting integration in life. And to be real sincere in implementing it. People who is just putting this on his mouth is just a piece of shit. You may pretend in front of me and i may smile to you. You may talk to me and talk to others differently, i may pretend not to know.

Please, while i am still using "please". Stop it before it goes worse. Don't ever challenge my patience, respect yourself and conduct in pride. You will never realize what i can do actually, you will never know my power and my knowledge. This is the first warning i issue. The next one, bear the responsibility yourself.

TiRiNg BuT eNjOyAbLe~~

I love these days very much. It's really tiring but i'm enjoying it. It's enriching. I slept for like 3-4 hours everyday. And some more so kanasai, every night i wanna sleep but awakened by the mosquitoes. They were really fierce. Bite me and bite Xian. Both of us could not sleep soundly. Hate mosquitoes. I really hope that tonight there will be no mosquitoes. Please. Beg you all. Go other place. Don't bite us. Please. Made me sleepy during lecture. I wanna pay attention!!!

This week went to help out at the booth of Phography Society's recruitment drive. So happy, because first day, there were 86 students joining our society. And 2nd day, there were 40 students recruited. Thanks for the supportive helpers to help us out. I had many things to complete. here are the list:

1. Post mortem meeting minutes

2. Activity Report

3. Exco meeting minutes

4. Penang Trip

5. Proposal to buy Studio light

6. Letter of Appreciation to Canon

7. Agenda

8. tidy up all the minutes to file

9. If no one help me keying in the new members, i might have to key in as well.

10. Assignments.

Life is so great. Thanks to my parents. Born me and teach me and trained me to be so tough. Give me chances to learn many things and b patient with me. I am really proud to be your daughter. I love you, Mum and Dad.